Top 5 online dating dos & don’ts

Photo No-Nos

Don't post a photo of yourself holding a beer. Do you think we want to know what brand of beer you drink? This is not Sigma Pi, and we care not. Don't post photos of yourself in which we can't see you. If you're standing 100 yards from the camera, your face is in shadow, or you're wearing a hat, you're messing with our dudedar. If we can't get a good look at you to figure out what kind of guy you might be, we probably won't get within 100 yards of you. Don't post photos of yourself looking ridiculous: dressed as a clown, covered in cake frosting, wearing Mardi Gras beads. We're looking for a mate, not a party animal. Do post recent photos of yourself in which you look happy and handsome. Now we're talking.

Be an Original

On an online dating site, you're one dude in a crowded virtual room. If you want to get one-on-one time with the ladies, you're going to have to stand out from the rest of the pack. If your profile describes you as "nice," "outgoing," "friendly," "sincere," "funny," "kind," "adventurous," or "hard working," we probably fell asleep before we finished reading it. Next! Do you know how many other guys use those exact same words? All of them. Get creative with your bio, bust out a thesaurus, and go out on a limb. Tell us what makes you unique and different, and we'll recognize your specialness through the virtual haze. Don't tell us you're funny; be funny. Remember, you're selling yourself, and your buyer is a woman. We don't want to read a generic, boring, cliché-addled personal resume. We're emotional buyers, and the real you closes the deal.

Get It Right

Women read anything into everything. But you knew that already, right? Checking out your profile, we're looking over your stats, we're eying your pictures, we're scanning your prose. We're trying to get a sense of who you are through every detail. Because this is a buyers' market (ours!), we're looking for a reason to exclude you. Take the time to polish your profile. A spell-checked, grammatically correct, well-written profile shows us you're on the ball personally and professionally, not some ne'er-do-well living in his mother's basement. While you're at it, don't fudge the facts. The truth about your age, height, and income are bound to come out down the line if we date. Women are like hunting dogs when it comes to sniffing out BS. Honesty is sexy!

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